A collection of apologies, read here.
I want to make it clear that everything you've heard and read is true.(1) I can also no longer deny to myself that there are issues I obviously need to examine within my own soul, and I've asked for help.(2) So if you're so thin-skinned that you took offense to a slip of the tongue that I had, then I offer my apology. I am, am sorry that you were offended.(3)
We admit that several members of our organization allowed an internal power struggle to cloud good judgment.(4) We should have done better.(5) I sincerely apologize and hope people realize that conversations can be easily manipulated in print.(6) And I don't care that he's black or green or purple or whatever.(7)
I failed.(8) I acknowledge that mistakes were made here.(9) I'm not a bad person. I'm a good person, but I said a bad thing.(10) I am not a bigot.(11) I never want to be portrayed as a guy who loses his cool.(12) That was a very intemperate remark made in the heat of the day yesterday in a very misguided attempt to defend my boss.(13) When I called him "Pruneface," it was campaign rhetoric.(14) I certainly would never intend to use the offensive word in its technical sense, and I would not and could not under any circumstances question the parentage of your son, our current governor.(15) Our trust has been broken, and only love can rebuild it.(16)
I probably should have waited a while before I scratch myself and spit.(17) I apologize, but I don't think I had the gay vote, anyway.(18) I certainly hope that no one was harmed or died.(19)
It is a shame that the metaphor I used was taken so radically out of context and slung about irresponsibly by the media.(20) I regret if my comment was misconstrued.(21) He didn't deserve to be whacked around like that, and I'll be the first to apologize to him for that. But he doesn't deserve to be a folk hero either.(22) If there were occasions when my grape turned into a raisin and my joy bell lost its resonance, please forgive me.(23) Several years ago, I asked for and received forgiveness from God and my wife in confession and marriage counseling.(24) It is with a heavy heart that I apologize this morning to Aunt Jemima.(25)
I did not view it as racial.(26) It's not an ethnic slur. You don't make an ethnic slur before several hundred people.(27) I grew up side by side with black people. Many are my dear friends.(28) As a Latino, I myself am offended.(29)
I can flap my lips all I want. Talk is cheap.(30) If we are deemed responsible for the accidents, that is another matter. However, there are maybe outside causes that had caused the accidents.(31)
There were a lot of human factors.(32) I grew up in a different era, and people said things then that are not acceptable today.(33) I suffered from an illness and I was sick.(34) I wanted to win so bad for my kids and my family, and I apologize to anyone who was inconvenienced.(35) I've lived in a state of constant fear and anxiety.(36) Dealing with being gay, while continuing to meet my public obligations, created tremendous internal pressures.(37) My days are incredible, you know: work, politics, troubles, moving around, public exams that never end, a life under constant pressure.(38) I have become so numb to the horrific things that happen in this world that I sometimes forget that there are still people who feel.(39) I shouldn't have labeled Mike as a "gay prostitute" or "male prostitute."(40)
We're sorry if this joke, which got a lot of laughs, offended anyone.(41) We have listened.(42) As you all know, I'm a satirical person.(43) In the course of the show, split-second judgment is made over ad libs.(44) Unfortunately, the need to babble as often as I do sometimes leads to unintended and unfortunate results.(45) It's three in the morning and the caffeine gets to us.(46) We've never had any type of complaint.(47)
I apologize to whoever I need to apologize to.(48) I apologize that some people don't have a sense of humor like I do.(49) I was trying to be the bigger man, but he was acting childish.(50) I said I'm sorry. What else can I say? I've lied and I admitted it. Life goes on.(51) I'm sure that I'm supposed to act all sorry or sad or guilty now that I've accepted that I've done something wrong. But you see, I'm just not built that way.(52) What do you want me to do? Go over and kiss the camera? What do you want me to do?(53)
FOOTNOTES
1. Mayor Gavin Newsom of San Francisco re his affair with the wife of his former campaign manager, 2007.
2. Isaiah Washington, a star of "Grey's Anatomy," re an anti-gay slur about his co-star T.R. Knight 2007.
3. Scott James, a Fox News Radio 600 KCOL host, re his on-air remarks equating homosexuals with child molesters, 2007.
4. The president of the Fayetteville (N.C.) Woman's Club re its rejection of a woman who would have been its first black member, 2007.
5. David Neeleman, the chief executive and founder of Jet Blue re the hundreds of passengers stranded at Kennedy Airport during an ice storm, 2007.
6. The actress Sienna Miller re anti-Pittsburgh remarks she made in Rolling Stone, 2006.
7. Red Sox pitcher Curt Schilling, re accusing Barry Bonds of using steroids and cheating on his wife and taxes, 2007.
8. Major General George W. Weightman re the uncleanliness of Walter Reed Army Medical Center, 2007.
9. Attorney General Alberto Gonzales re the dismissal of United States attorneys, 2007.
10. Don Imus re racist comments he made about the Rutgers women's basketball team, 2007.
11. Mel Gibson re his anti-Semitic remarks to a law enforcement officer, 2007.
12. Cleveland Cavaliers guard Damon Jones re an outburst during a game, 2006.
13. Representative Daniel Crane's press secretary, William Mencarow, re saying, "If they required the resignation of all congressmen who have slept with young ladies, you wouldn't have a Congress," 1983.
14. Mayor Coleman Young of Detroit re Ronald Reagan, 1980.
15. Justin Dart, a Republican Party donor, to Pat Brown, the former California governor and father of Gov. Jerry Brown, 1982.
16. The president of Wikia re a Wikipedia editor who lied about his credentials, 2007.
17. Roseanne Barr, after singing the national anthem at a San Diego Padres game, 1990.
18. Louie Welch, a Houston mayoral candidate, re saying that one way to stop AIDS is to "shoot all the queers," 1985.
19. Mary Ann Thode, the president of Kaiser's Northern California region, re patients' complaints about Kaiser's kidney transplant program, 2006.
20. Johnny Depp re saying in Stern magazine that America is "a dumb puppy that has big teeth that can bite and hurt you," 2003.
21. Mitchell E. Daniels Jr., the White House budget director, re inflammatory remarks made about Sept. 11 victim compensation, 2002.
22. Daryl Gates, the Los Angeles police chief, re the beating of Rodney King, 1991.
23. The Reverend Jesse Jackson, to the Democratic National Convention in San Francisco, re comments about Jews, 1984.
24. Senator David Vitter of Louisiana, admitting to having used escort services, 2007.
25. John Sylvester, a radio host in Madison, Wisconsin, re his comparing of Condoleezza Rice to Aunt Jemima, 2004.
26. Mary Horning, an Atglen, Pennsylvania, teacher, re having the two black students in her first-grade class portray slaves on an auction block, 1993.
27. Governor Guy Hunt of Alabama re saying he'd "never tried to Jew" a peach farmer, 1987.
28. Bob Crumpler, a Newport News, Virginia, car dealer, re being videotaped calling a black worker a "nigger," 1996.
29. Peter Dolara, an American Airlines senior vice president, re the airline's insensitive pilot training guide for Latin America, 1997.
30. Neeleman of Jet Blue.
31. Masatoshi Ono, Bridgestone/Firestone chief executive, re accidents attributed to his company's faulty automobile tires, 2000.
32. Former Los Angeles Kings owner Bruce McNall re his $326 million worth of financial misdeeds, 1997.
33. Dan Peavy, a Dallas school board member, re his repeated use of racial epithets, 1995.
34. Francis X. Vitale, a former executive of the Englehard Corp., re-embezzling $12.5 million from his company, 1998.
35. Elecia Battle of Cleveland re claiming to have lost her $162 million winning lottery ticket, 2004.
36. Andrew Speaker, an Atlanta lawyer, re traveling on a plane when he knew he was tubercular, 2007.
37. Representative Barney Frank of Massachusetts, re Stephen L. Gobie, who ran a prostitution business out of Frank's Washington apartment, 1989.
38. Former Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi of Italy to his wife re his flirtations with other women, 2007.
39. Marconi, a radio host in Portland, Oregon, re playing a tape of a beheading in Iraq and laughing about it, 2004.
40. Karen Booth, a leader of the Transforming Congregations ministry, re Mike Jones, who outed Ted Haggard, 2007.
41. David Young, the re-election campaign manager for Senator Jim Bunning of Kentucky, re the senator's comment that his competitor "looks like one of Saddam Hussein's sons," 2004.
42. Mars re using animal whey instead of vegetable whey in its candy bars, 2007.
43. Howard Stern re making jokes about the singer Selena, 1995.
44. Doug Tracht, a Washington radio host, re a joke he made on air about James Byrd Jr., who was dragged behind a car in Texas, 1999.
45. The Chicago Tribune's Mike Royko re a column on the unusual names of some black children, 1996.
46. Ryan Owens, an anchor for ABC's "World News Now" re his and his colleagues' laughter being overheard during the announcement of the actor Owen Wilson's suicide attempt, 2007.
47. The maker of the video Madden NFL '07 after a 14-year-old found pornography on his copy, 2007.
48. Herbert Miller, the vice president of sales for Merit Industries, re a plaque to be presented to James Earl Jones, but inscribed to James Earl Ray, 2002.
49. Shaquille O'Neal re having said, "Tell Yao Ming, 'Ching-chong-yang-wah-ah-soh,"' 2003.
50. Tommy Lee for having gotten into a fight with a fellow musician, Kid Rock, during Alicia Keys' performance during the Video Music Awards, 2007.
51. The Olympic runner Ben Johnson re having falsely denied taking steroids, 1990.
52. Pete Rose re his betting on baseball, 2004.
53. Bill O'Reilly, who'd said that if no weapons of mass destruction were found in Iraq, "I will apologize to the nation and I will not trust the Bush administration again," 2004.
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